Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Torn Between Two Lovers

"Torn between two lovers, feelin' like a fool / Lovin' both of you is breakin' all the rules"

Dear Ewan,

I just watched the trailer for your new movie, Deception, in which you are co-starring with Michelle Williams and Hugh Jackman. Hugh Mofo Jackman i.e. possibly your most bitter rival in the Sorry Dusty, But Cookie Would Totally Run Away to Aruba With This Man If Given Half the Chance contest.

Do you realize how much energy my eyeballs will expend trying to follow you and Hugh around on the screen without giving one of you preference over the other? Not to mention that my heart rate will most likely hit the roof and I'll have to do some serious yoga breathing to calm down and contain the SQUEE that will threaten to burst forth. For gods' sake, man, I'm eight months pregnant and breathless enough as it is from my unborn child jamming him/herself into my ribs! Are you trying to kill me?!

I'm so mad about this that I will only watch this movie once when it comes out next Friday. Okay, maybe twice, but that is my absolute limit. The third time I will only watch it on DVD. That'll learn ya.


"Torn Between Two Lovers" by Gracie Rivera in the P.I. and Mary MacGregor in the U.S. This was--oddly--my favorite song when I was three years old. I used to ask my yaya [nanny] to put this LP on the record player in the living room so I could sing along to it. Okay, really I belted it out at the top of my lungs. I think I wanted to be a torch singer when I grew up. It could still happen.
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