Monday, February 9, 2009

Someday My Prince Will Come

"Some day my prince will come / Some day we'll meet again / And away to his castle we'll go / To be happy forever I know"

Cookie: Mom and Dad have way too many Disney videos.

Maricel: I know. The only video I've ever bought is Sleeping Beauty. It's my favorite.

C: Why?

M: Prince Philip is hot. He's the only prince worth anything. He cut through a thorn forest, fought an evil dragon, and climbed a tower to rescue his love. And he can dance, too.

Cinderella's prince is useless. He followed her for like a hot ten feet, delicately saying, "Your slipper, my lady!" Go after her, fool! What, your $300 Italian shoes aren't meant for running or something? You gotta send your manservant out to look for the girl later? Useless.

Snow White's prince didn't even speak to her. He just showed up out of nowhere and found a pretty girl LYING IN A GLASS COFFIN and kissed her and took her off to his castle. That's heroic. What if she didn't want to go?

Prince Eric is an ass. He didn't even want Ariel once she lost her voice. Hello? She's a hot 16-year-old redhead who doesn't speak! Isn't that the all-time sick male fantasy? Damn.

Yeah, but Prince Philip: brave, determined, and cute. That's my prince, baby.

C: You've obviously thought a lot about this.

M: Girl, I've thought too much about this.

"Someday My Prince Will Come" from Snow White
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