Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Blue's Clues

"We just figured out Blue's Clues./ We just figured out Blue's Clues./ We just figured out Blue's Clues./We just figured out Blue's Clues./ Because we're really smart."

Conversations About Children's Television Shows: Part 1

"You just know that in reality, DJ Lance Rock is a homeless guy carrying around an old, hollow boom box filled with junk."
"Toodee's the rabid squirrel that lives in the boom box and bit DJ Lance so now he has rabies hallucinations about the junk coming to life."
"Aw, that's awful! But yeah."
"Foofa looks a little bit like a fancy bong."
"And Muno is definitely ribbed for your pleasure."
"Awww yeahhh."

"Did Diego and Alicia seriously just clean up that oil spill by using a giant vacuum?"
"Yep. And yesterday they coaxed a butterfly out of its cocoon and blew on its wings to dry them."
"You mean they killed the butterfly, basically."
"Girls, this is not how we do things in the real world."

"Well, hello there, Shout. How YOU doin'?"
"Kiki and Marina are pretty hot, too. Okay, the old Marina is hot. The new Marina is... not so much. At least she's not my type."
"Twist is cute in that goofy little brother way."
"We are checking out the characters on a children's television show."
"We need to have sex more often."

"So this article talks about how kids get upset when characters they know and love leave the show and are replaced by new ones."
"But Blue's Clues did it right! They told you Steve was going to college and Joe was going to take care of Blue. [At the screen]You should tell your kid to shut up and stop being stupid."
"You just yelled at my monitor."